22 March 2016

Too young to be old

After recent visits to two consultants, they have written a summary of their findings to my GP, copied to me,  describing me as a fit 65-year-old.    "Fit" as in "healthy", I suspect, and not as in the modern meaning of "Phwoar".  [Although, far be it for me to boast, some might say I was "phwoar" too.]  OK, I'll admit to being a stone  little heavier than I should be for my height, but I keep active, do aerobics, watch my diet and, apart from this blimmin tumour growing in my stomach, I am otherwise healthy. If you squint, I look like a cross between Twiggy and Lulu and am young at heart. Everyone says I don't look as old as I am. 

The date for my operation has now been decided (to happen before my mother's unfortunately), so just imagine, I get a letter from the hospital inviting me to their "Older Person's Pre-Operation Assessment Unit designed specifically with the older person in mind.  Zimmer frames optional. I aged rapidly overnight, just with the insult of that terminology alone. I'm thinking of turning up to the appointment with low cleavage, mini-skirt and 6-inch heels to see their reaction.

Tsch. Older person indeed.


Image result for cartoon of old lady in hospital

7 comments:

Anna of Mutton Style and Years said...

I saw two posters side by side once. One was adverting old person insurance for 50 years and over. Next to it a poster for clinics for late 40s early 50s pregnancy.

AGuidingLife said...

Any chance of taking this to read in the waiting room http://www.amazon.co.uk/Sex-Over-50-Updated-Expanded/dp/0399534369/ref=sr_1_8?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1458663516&sr=1-8&keywords=sex+for+old+people or if you are feeling very defiant, this:http://www.amazon.co.uk/NURSING-Nursing-Taboo-Creamy-Romance-ebook/dp/B014T2CPK2/ref=sr_1_5?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1458663516&sr=1-5&keywords=sex+for+old+people

:) good luck

auntiegwen said...

Go on do it! X

Nota Bene said...

Call me suspicious, but I believe this whole post is nothing more than an elaborate ruse to let us all know that you have an admirer, and we should all be jealous. I quote, "Although, far be it for me to boast, some might say I was "phwoar" too."

:-))

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

Hi Addy,
It's Sandy.

ChrisB said...

How very dare they!!!!