05 June 2009

Exam fever and the Bombay diet

School exams have started in earnest this week in our household. Of course, as always, just when you need to keep cool and concentrate, the weather has decided to climb into the 80s (Fahrenheit) or about 26 (Celsius), so Kay has been sweltering while she revises. Added to that she has had a terrible head cold which is now heading south to her chest, the poor little mite has been struggling to breathe. I have been trying to build her up with brain fodder and anti-virus food, such as salads, fish, blueberries and echinacea tablets. Hopefully that will pay off. The thanks I get for it is that I am now going down with it too. Still, unlike Kay, at least I don't have to bother my fuzzy head with analysis of chemical ions and aldehydes.

Greg meanwhile is now downing the whisky like it is going out of fashion and is currently going through a typical phase of his alcoholism that is oh so familiar - I have seen it many times before in the previous cycles he has been through. When he is well and truly in the grip of alcohol addiction, his appetite starts to disappear completely. He tends to skip breakfast and lunch altogether and only snacks very late in the afternoon, so that by suppertime he says he is not hungry. He declines to eat lunch with us and at suppertime may at best take minuscule portions which would not even fill a two-year-old. He will toy with the food on his plate with his fork and say that it doesn't taste of much....things which under normal conditions he usually relishes. Most of his food then ends up in the bin. At the moment, he is existing mainly on whisky, milk and strange concoctions he makes himself such as bombay mix with salsa sauce! It seems he has to really accentuate the spiciness of his food to get any taste at all. I think the alcohol kills all the little taste buds on his tongue. I am watching out for the next phase which will no doubt follow the usual pattern and develop into the upset stomach/hiccuping phase, followed by the more extreme gastric ulcer/ dash to the hospital phase. This morning he got up retching. Surprisingly that only starts to happen when his liver really has had really more than it can take. I've been there before. Watch this space.

20 comments:

Nechtan said...

Hi Rosiero,

I can sympathise as I have the same sort of cold at the moment as well. If anything it definitely makes concentration harder so I can understand how bad that is for Kay at this time when she needs clarity.

Sorry to hear Greg is once again down that same well trodden road. It must make it all the more frustrating for you to know its conclusion and have to watch it play out.

All the best

Nechtan

Fat, frumpy and fifty... said...

Oh Rosiero, How I wish I could DO something for you...just know I know.

And you feeling unwell is such a downer....

Is there any question of you leaving or would he? I know its never the right time, with and for Kay...but when she is settled at Uni...is it something you have considered?

It's walking that mile in your shoes...

laurie said...

man oh man. what can you do?

better to try to treat your daughter's cold than your husband's impossible disease.

kay needs chicken broth, and to soothe her chest she needs honey, warmed.

sounds like you do too.

Rebel Mother said...

Yeah your quite right about the taste buds. Tobasco sauce is a favourite because they can taste that.

Is he substituting breakfast for drink?

Also watch out if he falls over and hits his head. Hitting his head can lead to many, many more problems....

Christ! I'm with you girl, stay strong. Much love RMxx

Daphne Wayne-Bough said...

Is this because Kay's getting more of your attention than he is? Be careful he doesn't time his big dramatic scene for the eve of Kay's most important exam. Alcoholics are devious and manipulative.

Daphne Wayne-Bough said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
rosiero said...

Daphne. No, I am sure he does NOT do this for attention. He has been like this on and off for the last five years. (The Off-periods being when he had detoxed). It all started when he retired from a very high-powered, intellectual job.. Because of his physical ill health, he cannot do much, so I think he is bored, not mentally stimulated and very depressed. That is why the drinking has escalated from normal levels to the what he is now. Also as his health deteriorates even further, he gets frightened and more depressed. A vicious circle.

GoneBackSouth said...

Hi there, sorry I've not been over at all lately. I groaned when I read what's happening with Greg - you are one strong patient woman.

p.s. Thanks for commenting on my Dad's blog

Crystal Jigsaw said...

Yes, it sounds like you're ready for the imminent hospital rush.

Good luck to Kay in the revision. Really don't envy her!

CJ xx

rosiescribble said...

Oh poor Kay, and poor you as well. How stressful and frustrating for you all. If only we could help in some way.

Ellen said...

I am so sorry that Greg is going through a 'bad' phase of his illness, just at this crucial time when Kay is sitting her A-level exams. Wishing you both the strength to get through the next couple of weeks and that you will recover from your summer colds (nothing worse!) quickly. D

Nota Bene said...

I'm rooting for Kay, sympathising with you....and deciding to leave Greg to his own devices. You seem resigned to the inevitable there...so best wishes and best of luck

Working Mum said...

You are doing everything to make things go smoothly for Kay you really are a supermum; I have everything crossed for her (still dying to know what she's applied for). I hope that she can get through the A levels before your husband ends up in hospital again. I don't know how you manage to blog so calmly about it all, you are one brave lady.

Not Waving but Drowning said...

Oh Rosiero, I really feel for you,

GG

Flowerpot said...

You sound so calm and you must be in turmoil. Take care. Thinking of you and best of luck for Kay.

Strawberry Jam Anne said...

I do feel sorry for you and Kay Rosiero, suffering with summer colds. Do hope you both feel well again soon. Sorry too that you are suffering because of Greg. Hope Kay manages to concentrate OK with her revision and does well. Sending best wishes to you. A x

Robert said...

Very belated 1st anniversary best wishes!

Perhaps by the 2nd anniversary things will have improved? You never know.

I hope that Kay finds our current colder, wetter, more miserable weather more conducive to swotting.

And I hope your cold has run its course and you're feeling better.

Regards.

aims said...

Hey girl - Would Kay enjoy a summer at your mother's? Just wondering.

Shammickite said...

I've been there too... married to an alcoholic. It's not easy. But I finally got smart and left him to manage his own life. I'm so much happier now.

rosiero said...

Thank you as always for your supportive comments.

FFF - on my mind all the time and I may well walk. Just biding my time!

Laurie - thanks. Chicken broth tonight!

Rebel Mum - yes. Drinking starts as soon as he opens his eyes in the morning. he gets the shakes, if he doesn't.

Working Mum -all will be revealed if she gets to uni. Don't want to jinx things.

Aims - that idea occurred to me but Kay wants to stay in London near her friends and hang around with them in the summer. But we can go to my mother for long weekends.