20 September 2012

All by Myself

People keep me asking me how I cope on my own now without Greg, particularly as I don't have Kay living at home full-time with me any more either. The answer is simple..... I am an only child.

I have never had the luxury of brothers or sisters and have always  had to find things to entertain myself from a very young age. When I was very small, I had all sorts of imaginary friends I would speak to and play with. As I grew older, I read avidly or got absorbed in solitary hobbies. As a teenager growing up in a city as big as London, my schoolfriends lived quite a distance away (my school was at the time a well-sought-after grammar school and so could pick and choose their girls from a very wide catchment area) so it was not the norm to hang out with them in the evenings and at weekends, as they lived too far away or a visit involved a train journey across London.  It was really only when I went to university that my social life really took off. I don't have cousins either, as my mother ended up as an only child, although she was originally had two little sisters (see here) and my father's brother never had children at all.  I have always been used to a solitary way of life.

At present, my mother lives 60 miles away, Kay lives about 200 miles away, my two best friends live about 60 miles away in opposite directions, so it is never a simple matter to get to see any of them.  I have passing acquaintances I have made over the years and very good neighbours if I need someone in an emergency. Snoopy keeps me tied to the house at the moment as leaving him on his own for more than about 3 hours is nigh impossible. (I usually have to do a mad dash just to get to the supermarket and back before he frets). I always find something to fill my day and am always surprised when I look at the clock and see how late it is.

I've always been a simple home bird,  I don't really fidget to see whether the grass is greener in another part of the world (all grass is the same ultimately and  with few exceptions we all end up coming back to the place we call home). That is not to say I don't occasionally want to do something different for a change, but I don't feel deprived if I can't. I am happy with my own company too,  although that is not to say I don't welcome others visiting me.  It's just that having been an only child, I am used to dealing with (and content in) my own company.

So you see, the answer is.........I am doing all right...... (I think).

7 comments:

Nota Bene said...

Being comfortable in your own company is something that many people would benefit from...

dulwich divorcee said...

Being self-contained is a great skill, I think. I'm only just getting used to the odd day alone after six years and still find it daunting!

wife in the north said...

I'm an only child too. You grow up with a different way of being I think.

Shammickite said...

I know exactly how you feel. I live by myself too. OlderSon and family 40 min drive away.
YoungerSon and family 10 mins away.
I am an only child. No brothers, sisters, cousins, parents etc etc in this country, all relatives are in Uk. Husband and boyfriend both died. And I'm quite happy about living by myself. I have some great friends and neighbours. And lots to do on those rainy days when I don't want to go out!

Kelloggs Ville said...

Sometimes I just long to be alone, I'm sure I shall feel the opposite when te reality happens.

hyperCRYPTICal said...

Not an only child, nor indeed deprived of relatives of a similar age but I too am self-contained...

Never applied this label to myself until it was pointed out at nursing school at one of those group-bonding things where we had to describe the 'real' me...

I love company and like you have two great friends but in my case they are much nearer to home. But I love solitude too - but of my own choosing.

It is possible to be self-contained and lonely at the same time (at times!).

Anna :o]

Gill - That British Woman said...

glad things are going well for you.

Gill in Canada